Dear Mr. President,

We’ve never met. Still, I despise you more passionately than I ever thought possible. You are arrogant, dishonest, greedy, ill-informed, pompous, selfish, short-sighted, stupid, and untrustworthy. Truly, you are a despicable man.

Alas, you are also the man who, by virtue of a quirky electoral system, sits at the head of our government. (Save that load of horse-hooey about millions of people voting illegally for your opponent for the alt-facts crowd.) You’ve been our servant, now, for 169 terrible days, and you had 72 to prepare yourself for the job we gave you. (You had a lifetime, before Election Day 2016, but I don’t get a sense from you that you place much stock in being prepared.)